The Neverending Winter

Winter continues to hammer us nonstop with subzero temps and snow.  Oh the snow.  The media has been winding everyone up about collapsing roofs and ice dams.  I do know of some people who are experiencing leaks from the ice build up on the gutters which sucks, but so far our place is OK.  It rained a little bit and was 34 yesterday but it didn't seem to help my roof as much as I'd hoped.  The ice is still solid on top of the gutters.

I will say that the icicles do look pretty cool.

Snow on the rail trying hard to melt.

The weather has been hard on me mentally, and hard on the truck too.  My car makes weird noises when it's this cold. It's hard to not be completely lethargic all day long, eyes sliding in and out of focus on the TV or computer screen, hours slipping by as you mindlessly play Bejeweled Blitz.  

I had hubs home for a week after the last blizzard and we did what we could to get out a few times for breakfast & errands, or grab some takeout Chinese for lunch on Chinese New Year.  He helped me grocery shop for the house and also for my mom.  He's been really into wanting homemade soups lately so I've been lovingly preparing lots of new recipes, so that I can bask in the ultimate compliment, 'This is yummy, babe. Thanks!'

So with him home last week, and with my back virtually destroyed from all the shoveling, I cross stitched in my recliner with the heating pad on my back.  As is my usual MO with beaded cross stitch, once I get going and the design emerges, I obsess to the point of waking up in the middle of the night to think about where I want to pick up in the morning.  So I cranked out the stitched part and then was finally ready to add the beads which is, of course, the best part.

The beads make these projects really pop.  I beaded in two marathon sessions that lasted hours.  I didn't even stop to shower and kept saying, 'just one more thread's worth....just one more colour....'

And then these happened.....banana chocolate chip cookies with vanilla frosting.  Cause I woke up and it was snowing....AGAIN.....and dammit, I wanted cookies.  Hey anything to beat the winter doldrums at this point.

It's February 23rd.....last time I saw my yard was January 25th.  Can't believe we've endured a month of this crap.

Cold, Grey Bucket of Suck

We continue to have snow dumped on us in vast quantities on an almost daily basis.  Still no access to the deck except that square in front of the door and what I walked on to try and get the snow off the roof.  I have an ice dam up there that will not budge. 

I really miss covered parking and so does my poor car.  The wiper blades are up because it's just easier to clean the windshield after storms when they aren't frozen to it.  We are getting storm after storm, every other day.  It's soul-sucking, it really is.

No access to the front yard either.  Dogs have no choice but to go in the driveway, which is turning a gross shade of yellow and brown, even though I shovel the brown out of the way.

Snow piled against the pole and my neighbour's house.  They used to come down on weekends but they haven't been around since before the blizzard a few weeks ago.

The town of Bourne seems to find it amusing to come along after driveways have been plowed and bury the end of your driveway again.  The DPW got an earful from me after the blizzard.  Luckily we have a reliable plow guy who will come by and clear the end after Bourne buries it.  This is looking down to the end of the street.  So much yuck.

Have to keep the path to the shed clear in case the power goes out.  My back, neck, shoulders and arms are in so much pain....I don't think they'll ever feel better again.  I manage to get out to get errands done about once a week, but backing into the drive has proved difficult.  I got my car good and stuck in a snowbank on Sunday.  I sat in it and cried and cried before crawling out the passenger side and digging the wheels out.  We also try to get groceries for my mom between storms too, since she's completely snowbound.  Her driveway is a skating rink.

Since I'm housebound, I'm trying to do what I can to stave off despair.  I'd bought a bunch of candles before the blizzard.  Fortunately we didn't lose power.  We've continued to have high winds with the snow storms so I decided why not decorate some of them.  If we're gonna lose power, at least I can make it pretty.  

This is a confetti ball project I saw on Pinterest and then checked out the Crafty Chica tutorial HERE. I found it a lot more time consuming than the artist showed.  First of all, I used white glue, as she recommended.  I usually use clear floor wax to make stuff stick on the inside, but I tried that first and the sequins didn't stick well with it.  Cleaned out the ball and poured the glue in and started sprinkling sequins, multicoloured mylar confetti and glitter for filler.  The glue was clearly going to need some help to dry, so I baked it in the oven on 200 for 45 minutes.  Didn't work. I set it in the sunny south facing window for hours (which still gets warm sun even in the cold) every day that we had sun.  It's been 3 weeks and the bottom still hasn't completely dried. 

It also took a really long time to find a picture that looked good on the ball too.  I cut out pics of butterflies and flowers, and none of them looked good at all.  I opted for this angel that I mod podged onto the ball.  Then used glitter puff paint and clear rhinestones around the edge.  See how the glue is still white down the bottom?

My friend Fernanda asked me if I could stitch a kit she bought.  I said sure, so she sent me the kit, cloth and floss.  I started it but with my back hurting, I've had to put it aside b/c I can't hunch over the craft table.  There are a lot of colour changes and mixed threads that require a solid surface rather than my recliner arms.

This one's much easier to do while sitting with the heating pad.  Well till I get to the beads anyway.

The weather has also been quite conducive to comfort food.  I made a quinoa cheesy bread and a broccoli, mushroom, onion and 3-cheese quiche.  DELISH!

Finally got around to getting a bundt pan.  It's been my intent to make Russell a pineapple upside down bundt cake for his bday, and it occurred to me that it's coming up a bit fast.  So I wanted to give it a whirl.  I used a cinnamon swirl recipe found HERE.  I was afraid that the cake would come out of the pan in pieces but it came out pretty good!

It cooled for a couple hours before I made the glaze.

The only thing I'd do different is increase the cinnamon sugar in the center.  Other than that, it's wicked good!

I really hope this snowy nightmare ends soon.

Blah Blah Blah

I was over on Sugar Mag's blog earlier and she was talking about having the February blues.  I'm not one who is affected by SAD, but I am feeling a bit bored, restless and unable to concentrate on anything too.  I tried making jewelry over the weekend but was not into that either. Nothing's sold on Etsy in awhile but I haven't really done much to promote it. I'm between craft projects and between books.  I have had a lot on my mind lately.  A LOT.  It will become clear in a few months, but I am unable to do anything right now and that's part of my restlessness. I'm the world's most impatient person and so this goes against my nature.  It's also why I can't concentrate on anything.  Crafts, my job, every day life....can't do it.  Too preoccupied.  Don't know what to blog about right now, and the thing I need to blog about and get off my chest, I can't.  Yet. 

I had to take my camera to be cleaned at the camera shop in Lakewood, and despite being told it would be ready on Saturday, they neglected to tell me that they meant 'late afternoon'.  So I went out there when they opened for nothing.  I was pretty pissed.  Sunday was a really nice, clear and warm day too.  I wanted to go down to Mount St. Helens but w/o a camera, it's not worth the 200+ mile round trip drive.  I was hoping to go next weekend since I'm off for 4 days but the snow level is dropping so looks like I won't be taking any day trips next weekend either.  Trapped again.

38 more days till my trip back to Cape Cod.  That should be very interesting.  I just hope it doesn't snow.  I am really, really looking forward to the trip though.  This is the first time I can ever remember being stoked about heading east.  It'll be fun to see my old friends & my family.   Not to thrilled with the airport security procedures, but at least I can fly in comfortable first class. 

My job is getting more and more stressful.  All we do now is go to trial.  We seem to have a trial every week.  Half the time we can't get a Courtroom and we have to 'trail' for 4 days, which means we have to do all the trial prep, all the copying of exhibits and writing the legal memorandum and stuff, then my boss goes down to the Courthouse to sit around and wait for a Judge.  Most of the time the date gets set over, but we still have to go through all the machinations, just in case he does go out on the first or second day.  All anyone wants to do is fight.  The lawyers are fighting, their clients are fighting and no one wants to give an inch to the other side, so we go right up to trial.  There are some very, very damaged children out there, thanks to their parents' selfishness and using the kids as pawns in their sick little games.  We have so many high maintenance clients.  I just can't stand my job anymore.  I like the writing and all, but it's the constant demands that are made on us, as if each person thinks they are our only client.  I'm sick of being screamed at b/c phone calls & emails aren't being returned immediately.  Sometimes I think "Bittersweet Symphony" by the Verve is my theme song.

I get home at night and I'm so tired, but I try to sleep and I can't turn my brain off.  I can't eat.  My heart pounds so loud and so fast, it feels like it's going to come out of my chest.  I think I need to have a good cry but I can't even manage that.  I need peace and quiet.  I'm sick of noise and stress.   I never ever get the house to myself, yet I feel so alone.  It's all I can do to keep from running.  Far away.  Fight or flight is kicking in again and I'm having a hard time fighting.  I'm exhausted and I want to give up, but I can't, not now.  I've been freefalling into an abyss for such a long time, but it's coming to an end soon.  The light at the end of the tunnel isn't a train after all, but I still have a ways to go before I get there.  So every time I feel like this, I listen to "Tubthumping" by Chumbawamba: "I get knocked down, but I get up again, and they're never gonna keep me down..."  Makes me feel better to have a rallying cry I guess.  I've always drawn strength from music and lyrics that mean something to me.  

Maybe I'll make a mix tape, since it's clear I won't be going to sleep any time soon tonite, despite my utter exhaustion.