Seriously though, I am in the process of weaning off the anti-depressants that were prescribed for me when my dad died in 2003. Back then I definitely needed them, because I was going down that dark road of not wanting to leave the house and sleeping all the time. I'm still under a lot of stress, but these days, who isn't, right? I'm kind of tired of taking them. It's getting to the point where I forget, and if I go 2 days without them, I get all weird and disassociated. Sort of like the episode where Mr. Mackey takes drugs in "South Park" and his head flies around town like a helium balloon. Anyway, I'm on week #2 of the step down and I gotta tell ya, I'm choking up at the stupidest things. TV commercials, episodes of shows I've seen a thousand times, songs that aren't sad, the adorable puppies in "The Puppy Bowl" yesterday. I cannot even imagine what it must be like for a junky to quit hard drugs.
I'm not the world's most patient person on the road. OK, I have road rage. There. I said it. But today.....let's just say that it's a good thing I didn't have a rocket launcher because I would have left a 22 mile trail of carnage between Bonney Lake and Tacoma this morning. I get to work and it's 7:15 and the fucking phone starts ringing off the hook. With the high-maintenance clients too, of course. I haven't even gotten my computer booted up yet and I can feel my blood pressure rocketing upwards. There was nothing I could do to keep the contempt and disdain out of my voice as I answered the phone in such a way that they had to know I couldn't care less that their ex did something scandalous over the weekend, and I was very pissed off that they disturbed me.
If tomorrow starts off anything like today, I am going back on the anti-depressants because I gotta tell ya, I scare myself.
So, I leave you with "The Woman's Prayer"
So Far Today I Am Doing All Right.
I have not Gossipped, Lost my Temper
Been Greedy, Grumpy, Nasty, Selfish or Self-Indulgent.
I have not Whined, Cursed or Eaten Any Chocolate.
However, I Am Going to Get Out of Bed In a Few Minutes,
And I Will Need A Lot More Help After That.