May 30, 2008

Fool me once, shame on you

Fool me twice and your ass goes to juvenile hall. At least that's what SHOULD have happened.

I'm sure you all remember Washington's favorite juvenile delinquent, Semaj Booker, who managed to talk his way onto 2 flights last year, after stealing a car to get to SeaTac Airport, the day after he was busted for stealing, and crashing, another car in a high speed chase. He was all of 11 then. Judge McCarthy, here in Tacoma, issued an order requiring the kid and his mother to stay in Pierce County and not leave, pending resolution of the matter. So what do they do? Fly to LA to appear on "Dr. Phil". Judge McCarthy cuts him another break, and tells him to stay out of trouble for one year....or else.

The little juvenile delinquent was just bagged AGAIN at SeaTac, on the ramp to a flight leaving for Sacramento. He was trying to get to Texas, just like he tried last year. Authorities have decided not to file new charges, although I am hoping that Judge McCarthy yanks the deal off the table and throws this little shit in juvvy.

First, let's start with his name: Semaj. It's "James" spelled backwards and pronounced "Semahjay". How STOOPID is that? But don't get me started on all the names I find to be completely, utterly and eyerollingly lame, or else I will get branded as a "racist". Second, what is wrong with his mother? Has she lost complete control over her 12 YEAR OLD child that she has no idea where he is or what he's doing, ever? Third, if the kid hates it here that much and wants to return to Texas, then why doesn't she just send him, and good riddance? God knows the taxpayers of Pierce County don't need to be paying for what is likely to be a life of crime. I mean, if he's stealing cars and savvy enough to watch the TSA at the airport to pick the most lax screeners, then you know he's only going to get worse.

And that brings up another point. The TSA. When I went to the Cape, my passport and boarding pass were scrutinized so many times that I lost count (of course I don't need a passport to travel within the states, but it's that extra measure of peace of mind when going thru security). Meanwhile Semaj manages to work his way thru the many security check points, metal detector AND gate without a boarding pass, luggage or any photo ID. What does that tell you about how secure our airports are?

And from now on, you all can call me Ennaoj...pronounced "Ennahahjay".

Disturbing commercials

So we're watching TV the other night, and a commercial comes on for one of the many bladder control medications. It shows a bunch of water balloons, dancing under a disco ball in a gym. The banner reads, "CLASS OF '68". 1968?????? Geez Louise! When I was young, I really thought we would stay young forever. There's no need to tell me that I have "Peter Pan Syndrome" because I readily admit it. I have watched my friends grow up around me, and decorate their homes "age appropriately", but I never moved past dorm room decor. Or wearing tie dye shirts and ratty sweats. Or caring about my appearance. I just don't give a tiny little rat's ass what other people think of me or my house. I yam what I yam.

And I SWEAR TO GOD, I was about to throw the remote thru the TV the other night when a Verizon commercial came on, and they were singing to the tune of "We Wish You a Merry Christmas." It's fucking MAY! It's bad enough we will be subjected to this nonstop barrage of carols starting in October, so give it a rest already, Verizon!

Just plain disturbing

I read in a magazine that a new product has hit the market for babies. It's a rectal thermometer that plays the theme to "Spongebob Squarepants". Don't get me wrong, I love Spongebob and Brian downloaded the theme to my cell phone for it's ring tone. But really, a rectal thermometer that plays music? I do NOT want to see that kid's psychotherapy bill.

Celebrities

One of our clients was in his cups a month or so ago, and decided to order a ton of magazines for our office. His choices were really bizarre. A couple of the mags are celebrity related. I thumb thru them at lunch, or take them to the gym. But I am just disgusted by the kind of media attention these people get. WHO CARES????? And quite frankly, the Olsen Twins scare me with their vacant stares. Tom Cruise scares me too. Now there's an example of someone who has boldly gone where no man has gone before. Then we have the copious coverage of the various and sundry Pop Tarts: Britney & her tartlet sister Jamie Lynn, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, ad nauseum. We have the feud b/t 2 celebs I've never heard of over some sex tape, which I'm sorry, but if you make a sex tape and you are a celebrity, there is the reasonable expectation that it's going to be on YouTube in less than 24 hours. So qwitcherbitchin about it, you stupid skanks.

And speaking of celebrity mag rags, I find it so gross and offensive that they have pages of "best boobs after baby", or close ups of actresses cellulite in bikinis, or take shot at ones who gained weight. Meanwhile, on another page, they have "cutest paunch" for fat male celebrities. Take Kevin Federline. He looks like he ate his ex wife AND their 2 kids. But do they criticize him for gaining weight? Noooooo, of course not. This double standard has got to go.

Bikini Barista Battle a Bust in Bonney Lake

Killer alliteration, eh? And get it? "Bust"???? Several months ago, many small drive up coffee shops decided to feature young girls in skimpy bathing suits and lingerie. It's been somewhat controversial, with letters to the paper from people both for and against it.

Well, a couple of weeks ago, Brian came home and told me that he saw a girl wearing nothing but blue butterfly pasties and panties at the Hot Chick-a-Latte stand near our house. Keep in mind, he was driving by at about 35 mph at the time. This from the man who "doesn't see" the dirty dishes in the sink or newspapers on the floor. Yet he was somehow able to not only describe the shape but colour of the pasties.

Apparently a mom w/ a couple of kids who were at the gas station next door, saw it and pitched a major league fit when her kids said, "Look mom! A naked lady!" KING-5 news was called and they came down to Bonney Lake to cover the story. They interviewed the coffee stand people and the woman who complained. The story got picked up by CNN and other newspapers around the country. Last weekend, a protest was planned for both Hot-Slut-A-Latte and the Cowgirls stand on Highway 410, from 7:00 am to 6:00 pm, all 3 days.

Brian decided to go down there for the protest, and broadcast it live on the Free World Pub, which airs on Sat. mornings on Blog Talk Radio. Unfortunately, no one from either side wanted to comment because they were really pissed at the media for blowing it out of proporation. I guess the woman that complained only was angry about the pasties, not the wearing of bikinis. But she was branded as the bad guy. The City Council is, however, looking into what constitutes indecent exposure.

It wasn't much of a protest anyway. When I drove by at 8:30 to do my errands, there was the woman, her husband & kids, and 2 other people. Meanwhile, Hot Slut-A-Latte had a line around the corner which kept up all day. The protestors were gone by 10:30, never to return.

What say you, my peeps, on this issue?

16 comments:

  1. nix to the sponge bob thermometor!

    please tell me what bikini's and pasties have to do w/ coffee? and why is when someone tries to stand up for what they are for or against they get branded at all??

    and don't even get me started on tom cruise. imho, the only thing he's good for are a coupla cool movies from the 80's.

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  2. Anonymous6:58 PM

    hmmmm, how about a thermometer that plays "the victors"?
    and people have no SELF-respect, let alone respect for other people when they resort to sex and being naked to sell a non-sexual product.

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  3. Anonymous7:16 PM

    EEEEWWWW! I will never be able to watch Sponge Bob again!
    I am with you, Jojo. We make people famous for all the wrong reasons.
    Just wait till there is a big accident because of the scantily clad coffee girls. Around here people like the "buy coffee and get a chance to win gas" gimmick.

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  4. Someone wrote in a good letter to the paper, that maybe we shouldn't be protesting the coffee stands, but the stupid, knuckle-dragging neanderthal men who patronize these places.

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  5. PS to Liz: In April, Brian was hit by a large Potelco truck that was exiting a bikini barista stand, b/c the guy wasn't looking where he was going. He could have gotten coffee at any one of the other millions of coffee places, but chose that one & caused about $2k in damage to Brian's Santa Fe.

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  6. Er, pasties? As is Cornish meat pastry pies?

    Yeah, safe driving problem, should only be allowed inside in carefully regulated strip joints.

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  7. Val - LOL!!!! No, not pasties! Ew could you imagine??

    Anything you stick over your nipple is a "pastie" (pronounced "paystee"). The little tassle caps on strippers are called pasties over here.

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  8. The thermometer will probably be a big seller...The American consumer scares me!

    The Olson twins. Can you imagine what they're going to look like when they're 80? (If the live that long) Maybe I should say...Can you imagine what they'll look like when they're 30!

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  9. On the CF site I go to,they linked to a new product for kids,it was slightly more gross than the Sponge Bob thing.It was a portable potty for your toddler rugrat!Eww!Some lady was saying how great it would be for use at the park or airport!Can you imagine seeing THAT while you are waiting for your flight or having a picnic?

    It is a glorified bowl with a big in it!

    When I was little my Mom actually took the time to walk me to a restroom and what did I do until then?I held it!Is it too much for parents to teach their kids something other than instant gratification?

    How about we get MEN to sell coffee in their boxers?D'Onofrio,Depp,Galecki (look him up),Downey,Rosenbaum,etc.I think coffee would never be so interesting again after having one of them serve it to me.

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  10. And quite frankly, the Olsen Twins scare me with their vacant stares.

    HAHAHA! Glad I'm not the only one!

    Trying to figure out which drug they are on. (Maybe both on different ones?)

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  11. see, i don't buy celeb magazines. i used to find it entertaining to ready people magazine, i picked up that habit from a friend, but it's just annoying to me now. you're right, who cares about them? as long as they keep acting or singing, i'm good at that point.

    im sure that semaj kid got through security so easy because he's a kid. which just goes to show you that the tsa needs to be a little more aware of not just adults, but kids as well. and yes, that kid is in a lifelong act of trouble. hopefully they correct it, but i doubt it.

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  12. Anonymous1:56 PM

    Mmmmm... classy. I'm loving this trend of names spelled backward. Why didn't I think of that? I could've had a son named Tarf or Poop. Oh wait, that's a palindrome so I guess it doesn't count. New spellings of old favorites is a great way to show off your creative spirit. Bollocks to those people who think you're illiterate!

    Of course if you REALLY want to project an urbane flavor, there's always that ol' chestnut, Pig Latin. People will think you're bilingual.

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  13. We have one of those slut-latte places in Auburn too. I think they're AWFUL. As a mother of a 14-year-old girl who will be in the job market in a couple of years, I hate to think that she will have to submit to middle-aged men oggling her nearly naked body in order to make minimum wage as a barista. What's next? McDonalds? This isn't food service, this is adult entertainment, which doesn't belong on display on main streets of small town Washington. When people want to see what men look like nearly naked before deciding if they qualify to sling burgers, then I'll calm down about this.

    Thanks for asking.

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  14. Yeah Bryde! I'd go further and say 'Jockstrap', heh, heh.
    But seriously, I don't like coffee- selling near-naked ladies, ewww.
    When FPM was about 5 we went to the river and he saw a gal in a thong bikini. He said (loudly) "Hey mom, you can see that lady's butt!" She heard him too. I thought it was funny that she seemed embarrassed. So don't show yer ass cheeks to the world, be-yotch!

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  15. A rectal thermometer for kids??? :-O

    Why is the phrase 'child abuse' coming to mind...

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  16. ps - actually if it played the choral bit of Beethoven's 9th or something...

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